Friday, July 23, 2010

When I Loved Myself Enough

You know those moments in life when you can just feel everything is changing? Knowing that after this moment your life and who you are as a person will be different? It's one of those events where you know it may be tough right now, but you can feel yourself becoming stronger, evolving, and becoming the person you want to be. And sometimes in those moments you question yourself, you need a pick-me-up to help you find yourself in the midst of all the chaos.

Well my pick-me-up last summer was two books - Eat.Pray.Love and When I Loved Myself Enough. These books still rest on my nightstand and I occasionally flip through my dog-eared, pen-marked pages when in time of reflection before bed. Both books have helped me find my inner-strength and taught me life lessons that I continue to reflect on when I find myself in need of a little wisdom. These words helped me understand my strengths, my weaknesses, my wants, my goals, and most importantly myself.

My favorite quote from When I Loved Myself Enough is:

"When I loved myself enough
I quit settling for too little."

I have soooo many more, but this one inspired me the most and sums up the transformation I went through during this life changing stage.

The other night as I was lying in bed reading my cards from Justin, I felt inspired to write in my journal my own quotes about when I knew I loved myself enough. Here are a few that depict me...

When I loved myself enough
The important things and people in my life became clear, and I realized what matters most is myself and the people who make me a better person.

When I loved myself enough
I began to challenge myself physically and mentally because I was stronger with this love.

When I loved myself enough
I was able to love him with my full heart and I wasn't afraid.

When I loved myself enough
I quit worrying about how much I want to make and focused on doing what makes me happy.

When I loved myself enough
I consciously removed the people and things who bring me down, and I looked to those who bring me up.

When I loved myself enough
I cried when I wanted to instead of smiling.

When I loved myself enough
My heart felt strong, my mind felt able, and I felt ready for change. For the first time, I welcomed it.

People always say you can't love someone else until you truly love yourself. And for me it wasn't until this past year when I could finally feel what truly loving myself felt like. I would find myself jumping on the inside and saying to myself in my mind "I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy." I could feel I was heading in the right direction. For the first time I was so in love with myself and my decisions that I was able to experience what true love felt like in a relationship when it approached me.

And now I'm going through another change, but this one is different. I'm beginning a new chapter in my life - the Young Professional chapter. I'm moving out of my cozy college town environment to a life in the city and beginning my first big girl job. Normally I don't adapt well to change, but this time I'm excited. I'm excited to have a strong relationship, strong friendships, and a strong family in my life here to share these moments with me. I'm excited to challenge myself in my career and begin working my way up in the world. Most of all I'm excited to begin experiencing all the dreams I've been waiting to fulfill, the American dream events that will eventually fall into place, and to finally become the person I am destined to be.


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